Out of the darkness, the light

Image with gratitude to Arthur Aldyrkhanov at Unsplash

Out of the darkness the light

From the pain the bliss

The void of despair calls me

I struggle to evade her

Looking the other way

Busying myself with self-important matters

Shame calls

I hide in TV

I hide in food

I hide in bed, under the covers

Shame finds me and I drown in her tears

Falling into the void, despair opens her arms to me

Deeper and deeper I fall

Caught in her heavy embrace

Giving up the struggle to be someone else

Giving up the struggle to be the best me

Giving up myself

Resting in the darkness

Nothing left

Silence

Awake in my sleep

Open

And out of the darkness comes the light

The more I open the more I receive

From the pain the bliss

Out of the darkness the light